A Flu Bug Stuck On My Mind

     "Mom! He hit the wall and it shot straight up!"  Yes, there are moments like today, when I can be honest and confess to loving that ceramic throne.  You know, the one that drives its contents to- who knows where- with one flush.  Being a mom is humbling enough already, but on mornings like these, I now just wish I could have stayed in bed. I gather my supplies and begin climbing the stairs with my bucket, rag, and a ruffle-trimmed plastic glove in hand.  At the top, there it is, strewn across the floor and splattered up the white wall.  All I can think about is my growing list of questions.  "How am I going to chip those pieces off of the wall? Why didn't he make it to the toilet?  Was the light off?"  With a lung cleansing sigh, I snap on the protective plastic and press the tubes over my fingers.  I fold down unto my knees and popping noises remind me that I am not a limber young mom any longer, while a few more questions float around in my mind like white mental clouds.  They ask, "Why am I cleaning this up?  How long can I hold my breath?"  I then peel a string of paper towels up off of the carpet only to reveal the sinister cover up.  Nothing was accomplished in the clean-up department following the event. The lentils are now sticking like dried flu bugs on a windshield to both the wall and the twisting carpet fibers.

     My three year old jumps into my shallow lake of self-pity without considering my reaction to his thoughtful questions. "Mom, can I help? Can I come up there? Can I rub your back?"  That last question softens my bitterness and I confess that I don't want to surrender to brighter options. I just want to stay all-consumed with my own ideas. It's during the lengthy scrub down, that a different thought draws out a chuckle from my throat. God just might want to reveal something in this fiasco.

    In moments like these, when my anxiety is bounding, what might I consider being grateful for?  Maybe that my current enemy is only lentil soup covered in stomach juices and not something much worse. Or maybe that God wants to free my mind and life from the deception of anxiety.  This last Sunday, I was reminded that I face choices daily to replay my anxious thoughts and feelings on my own mental screen.  The images are relentless and replay without my even realizing it until I feel panic, helpless, and worn out.  I was reminded also, that I am not trusting God with everything when I am feeling these emotions.  I was glad to learn that gratefulness and thankfulness play the key part in guarding my mind when I feel tempted to let down my guard.  It was an eye-opener but so true, it was just what I needed to hear from my Father who sees right into my heart.  I have been holding back and lukewarm. I've become weak at asking myself and my family a once routine question; "So what are you grateful for?"- and in His grace, He's revealed that to me.  So, I share with all of you who believe so that you might receive encouragement today. Let's ask God together, to remove our blindness, lift us out of tepid waters, and make us a grateful people that are full of trust and faith in God's power to make right all that is wrong.  It's true, in life, we just never know what a day may bring, but I do believe that God wants me to be grateful even when I am cleaning up flu bug vomit and to trust that he works all things- all things- for the good of those who love him.

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."  Philippians 4:6 & 7


"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."  Romans 8:28


                                              A Letter Written to a Church in Rev. 3:14-21